Back in the muther fuckin saddle

my six shooter strapped and I'm lookin for a battle

Out on the plains I'm just a loner

my saddle horn rubs right and yo it's givin me a boner

I got thoughts of Annie Oakley

but that buck toothed tramp in that last town she broke me

And we didn't even fuck

I gave my last gold tooth 'n gold nugget to get my dick sucked

3 days out on the frontier

and I'd kill for a cheap whore and a barrel of cold beer

I need a slut for a service

I take a peak at the shiip and they all run away nervous

Man I gotta get my rocks off

cuz my Wranglers don't fit right unless my cock's soft

Long nights by the fire me a Trigger.....go figure

[Chorus]

I'm a desperate rado

didn't take any practice

A desperate rado

got a cock like a cactus

Now I drift through the desert like a wild coyote

horny as a toad trippin off peyote

Holdin uptrains and gettin goods by the sack

I'm known thru out the west as the pie eyed mack

And to the law I'm no stranger

I'm wanted dead or alive cuz I shot the Lone Ranger

And then Tonto tried to get down

so I boned his bitch slit hes throat and then I skipped town

That's the way I run my show

paint towns red

fuck hoes and then I lay low

I know you think I'm archaic

but my dick's like a sword

I see pussy and wanna slay it

Out on the plains it gets linely

sometimes I feel homely

new faces

new towns no one knows me

Guns cocked in my holster

u see my face in each town nailed to a pole on a poster

I'm always lookin for the quick buck

then always blowin my cash on a bitch with a big butt

Some say my head's hollow

Fuck em....I'm just a

[Chorus II]

Desperate rado

trottin thru the bad lands

A desperate rado

tokin down with all the cowhands

A desperate rado

didn't take much practice

A desperate rado

got a cock like a cactus

Now I fuck whores by the scores up ten fold on any fellow

in any town I can be found at the local bordello

Never yellow never chicken listen for my spurs draggin,

and when I'm kickin dust you better circle up the wagons

So when I rip thru your town don't be gawkin

just tip your hat and Tex keep walkin

Cuz I'm a gun slingin top hand

fuck with me and you'll go out like Custer at his last stand

I'm a low down buckaroo

if you leave me alone with your mother then I'll fuck her too

Cuz I'm a sidewinding nomad

and morals in upbringing is something that I never had

Known as the ruff ridin Texan

a bad buck from the day of my inception.

And I was raised in the poor house

my mother kicked me out so she could start a whore house

Now since the day I left the corral

I've been on a quest for the plant that's called mescal

Cuz pale rider once pulled me aside

and told me that high was the best way to ride...

[Chorus III]

Now I'm a desperate rado

always lookin for a fight

A desperate rado

puffin on a peace pipe

I'm a desperate rado

on the run from the law

A desperate rado baddest one you ever saw