You see it on the telly, all the shows about police,
"Yeah real life stuff with blood and guts that show it like it is"'
The poms have got the Sweeney,
"The yanks start too much",
But we're Australian super cops they call us Fair and Just.

'Cause I'm a fair dinkum asshole, "And I'm just a proper cunt",
We used to be distarbowed but this is much more fun,
"Kickin' ass and crackin' skulls", and bustin' our own moms,
The best two coppers you can buy they call us Fair and Just.

I was born a fuckin' asshole so to me the job's just right,
"And I deserve a fuckin' badge bein' a dead cunt all me life",
And we're the fuckin' perfect pigs, "The fuckin' best there is"
You'd have to team up walk in hell to find a bigger pair'a pricks,
'Cause I handle all the hookers, "And me I handle thugs
And I get off on bashin' poofters", and I get off on drugs,
And I like interviewin' molls, 'cause they ain't got a fuckin' quid,
"And I like interviewin' cunts around the face and fuckin' head".

Yeah I'm a fair dinkum asshole, "And I'm just a proper cunt",
We used to be distarbowed but this is much more fun,
"Kickin' ass and crackin' skulls", bustin' our own moms,
The best two coppers you can buy they call us Fair and Just.

"I would'a liked to'a been a meetin' cop but, just imagine that",

Yeah a burnt out resource with a cunt, half way up it's back
And I like pinchin' lady drivers 'cause I give 'em all a chance,
"Yeah with your special triple eyes and kit hangin' out your pants",
But we've learned some pretty useful stuff since we've been on the
Force,
Yeah like how to hold me fuckin' hand out, "And how to use a knife
And fork,
We're almost fuckin' human", yeah but the hardest thing we've found
Is how to walk without our fuckin' knuckles draggin' the ground.

'Cause I'm a fair dinkum asshole, "Yeah I'm just proper cunt",
We used to be distarbowed but this is much more fun,
"Kickin' and crackin' skulls", bustin' our own moms,
The best two coppers you can buy they call us Fair and Just.

"Yeah you're a fair dinkum asshole" and you're just a proper cunt,
We used to be distarbowed but this is much more fun,
Out there kickin' ass and crackin' skulls, "And bustin' our own moms",
The best two coppers you can buy they call us Fair and Just.

'Cause I'm a fair dinkum asshole, "Yeah and I'm just a proper cunt",
We used to be distarbowed but this is much more fun,
"Kickin' and crackin' skulls", and bustin' our own moms,
The best two coppers you can buy they call us Fair and Just.