HELLO OPERATOR. ID LIKE TO MAKE A CALL
CAN I HAVE 477 3104?
IM SORRY SIR, COULD YOU REPEAT THAT NUMBER ONCE AGAIN?
477 3104, DID YA GET IT THEN?

COULD YOU SPEAK A LITTLE SLOWER? 477S ALL I GOT
3104, ARE YOU BLOODY DEAF OR WHAT?
LOOK, I GOT THE FIRST BIT, BUT I JUST CANT GET THE LAST
WELL STICK THAT FUCKIN PHONE UP YOUR FUCKIN ARSE

STICK THAT FUCKIN PHONE, UP YOUR FUCKIN ARSE
YOURE SUPPOSED TO FUCKIN HELP, NOT MAKE IT FUCKIN HARD
IM JUST TRYIN TO MAKE A CALL, BUT YOURE JUST BEING 
SMART
SO YOU CAN STICK THAT FUCKIN PHONE, UP YOUR FUCKIN ARSE

GOOD MORNING IM FROM TELECOM, COME TO DISCONNECT YOUR 
PHONE
FOR A BREACH OF REGULATIONS JUST A COUPLE OF DAYS AGO
YOU UPSET OUR OPERATOR WITH A PRETTY NASTY CALL
WHAT ARE YOU FUCKIN ON ABOUT? IT WAS ALL HER FUCKIN 
FAULT!

WELL SHE CLAIMS THAT IT WAS ALL YOUR FAULT, SHE REALLY 
WAS DISTRESSED
WHAT ABOUT YOUR CUSTOMERS, SHE UPSET ME FIRST!
WEVE GOT HER WRITTEN STATEMENT, WHICH SHORTLY WILL BE 
READ
BUT IT MIGHT HELP IF YOUD RECALL EXACTLY WHAT YOU SAID

I SAID

STICK THAT FUCKIN PHONE, UP YOUR FUCKIN ARSE
YOURE SUPPOSED TO FUCKIN HELP, NOT MAKE IT FUCKIN HARD
IM JUST TRYIN TO MAKE A CALL, BUT YOURE JUST BEING 
SMART
SO YOU CAN STICK THAT FUCKIN PHONE, UP YOUR FUCKIN ARSE


WELL THATS NOT EXACTLY ON SIR, ITS JUST NOT ON AT ALL
YOU MUST USE COMMON ETIQUETTE IF YOU WISH TO MAKE A 
CALL
AND PLEASE AND THANK YOU ALSO HELP, YOU CANT TALK TO 
HER LIKE THAT
PLEASE AND FUCKIN THANK YOU WELL YOU FUCKIN TELL HER 
THAT!

AND SHE KNOWS WITHOUT A TELEPHONE IM REALLY IN THE SHIT
WELL PERHAPS IF YOUD APOLOGISE THAT JUST MIGHT HELP A 
BIT
APOLOGISE? APOLOGISE? APOLOGISE TO WHO?
JUST GO IN AND ASK FOR OPERATOR 42

GOOD MORNING, ARE YOU WAITING? IS THERE SOMETHING I CAN 
DO?
YES, ID LIKE TO SPEAK TO OPERATOR 42
IM SORRY SIR, I MISSED THAT, COULD YOU REPEAT WHAT YOU 
JUST SAID?
AH SHIT! I DONT BELIEVE IT! HERE WE FUCKIN GO AGAIN!

OPERATOR 42, LOOK ILL JUST WRITE IT DOWN
OH OPERATOR 42, ILL SEE IF SHES AROUND
JEEZ, THEYRE BLOODY USELESS, IM SURE THAT THEYRE ALL 
DEAF
NO WONDER THAT I DID ME QUINCE, NO WONDER THAT I SAID

STICK THAT FUCKIN PHONE, UP YOUR FUCKIN ARSE
YOURE SUPPOSED TO FUCKIN HELP, NOT MAKE IT FUCKIN HARD
IM JUST TRYIN TO MAKE A CALL, BUT YOURE JUST BEING 
SMART
SO YOU CAN STICK THAT FUCKIN PHONE, UP YOUR FUCKIN ARSE


NOW THEYLL MAKE ME SIT AROUND AND WAIT ALL BLOODY DAY
JUST SO THEY CAN MAKE ME SWEAT AND HAVE THE FINAL SAY
THATS LIKE THE PUBLIC SERVICEM THEY MAKE YOU SCRAPE AND 
BBOW
ARRGGHH SHIT! SHES FUCKIN UGLY, IF THATS HER COMING 
NOW!

IM OPERATOR 42, IM BUSY, MAKE IT FAST
DID A BLOKE TELL YOU TO STICKTHAT FUCKIN PHONE RIGHT UP 
YOUR ARSE?
YES HE DID, THE FILTHY ANIMAL, I REMEMBER NOW
WELL YOUD BETTER FUCKIN BRACE YOURSELF CAUSE THEYRE 
BRINGING IT AROUND!!

STICK THAT FUCKIN PHONE, UP YOUR FUCKIN ARSE
YOURE SUPPOSED TO FUCKIN HELP, NOT MAKE IT FUCKIN HARD
IM JUST TRYIN TO MAKE A CALL, BUT YOURE JUST BEING 
SMART
SO YOU CAN STICK THAT FUCKIN PHONE, UP YOUR FUCKIN ARSE


STICK THAT FUCKIN PHONE, UP YOUR FUCKIN ARSE
YOURE SUPPOSED TO FUCKIN HELP, NOT MAKE IT FUCKIN HARD
IM JUST TRYIN TO MAKE A CALL, BUT YOURE JUST BEING 
SMART
SO YOU CAN STICK THAT FUCKIN PHONE, UP YOUR FUCKIN ARSE