I need to go shopping
These shoes are all wrong
Just look in my closet
Not a thing to put on
I wonder how these jeans make me look from behind
Things that never cross a man's mind

Lets turn off the TV
Now can't we just talk
Let's lay here and cuddle
'Til we both drift off
If we don't make love
That'll be just fine
Things that never cross a man's mind

That joke is too dirty
This steak is too thick
Ain't no way in the world I'll ever finish it
That car is too fast
This beer is too cold
And watching all this football is sure getting old
Wish I was working this weekend
Not on the lake threading my line
Things that never cross a man's mind

Her lips are too red
Her skirt is too tight
Her legs are too long
And her heels are too high
Boy, she looks like the marrying kind
Things that never cross a man's mind

That joke is too dirty
That steak is too thick
Ain't no way in the world I'll ever finish it
That car is too fast
This beer is too cold
And watching all this football is sure getting old
Wish I was working this weekend
Not on the lake threading my line
Things that never cross a man's mind

I feel a little bloated
I think I'm fixing to start
That movie was good except for the violent parts
Brad Pitt is sexy
Why did he change his hair
I knew him and Jenny never had a prayer
These curtains clash with the carpet
The color scheme is a crime
Things that never cross a man's mind
Things that never cross a man's mind