(verse 1)
This is about a girl that looks like Lana
except that she's hotta, I'm talkin about Shauna
That's why this song will be dedicated to her honor
For her I'd convert to a Jew and celebrate Rosh Hashonah
I'd give everything I have to be her life partner
Oh my God, please marry me and have my daughter
I snuck through your window, got shot by your father
It's his right to bear arms, it's my right to holla
I be like Romeo calling you like I'm a balla

Oh God, girl, I want you in my world
Seeing you with other guys just makes me hurl
I'd skip every class and get a lotta office referals
Just to spend time with you and maybe we can curl
And I dont mind hangin out with your home girls
But I'm too poor so dont expect to get no pearls

(chorus)
Oh Shauna, oh my God-a
Please give me your number so I can call ya
Oh my God, your boyfriend must be a God huh?
Anyone who sleeps with you is, oh queen Shauna
Please Shauna, take a ride in my old school Impala
Oh my God, I'm in love with Shauna

(verse 2)
You cheerleadin Goddess, I worship your hottness
You may think I'm a loser, I swear to God, I'm not this
And some of the guys you datin aint got shit
Treatin something so special like it's an object
They aint worthy of you, cuz you know you're hot shit
I hear blasphemous shit talkin, but you're not a bitch
But if you keep your standards high, sorry I'm not rich
You can make me your servant, and I will not bitch
I'd do anything for such a hot chick

Not even Whitney O can be compared to you
When you do an aerial you light up the whole school
All will bow down to you and your rule
Whoever doesnt appreciate you is a fool
If you dont like me, then that's cool
And if you think my rhymes suck even worser than Jewel
I'll leave you alone cuz that stalkin shit is bull

(chorus)

(verse 3)
Shauna Bubis, let me kiss those cute lips
We can reach Nirvana like a Buddhist
Or we can do it anal and do some other crude shit
And I aint a pimp, so I wont slap you like a bitch
The sound of your sweet voice really excites my dick
But it rips apart my heart seeing someone else give you a kiss
Please let me hug you, oh great Goddess
You know I love you, that was the meanin of all this
If you want me to fuck off and mind my own biz
I'll obey your command, but I'll still be ejaculatin jizz

(chorus)