Jon Cozart
Jon Cozart - Star Wars In 99 Seconds lyrics
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Long, long time ago, long time ago in a galaxy Far in a galaxy, far far away [Episode I: The Phantom Menace] There once was a boy slave destined to save space He wins a big pod race and hits on a queen Padme's a cougar Qui gets killed by Darth Maul who is then chopped in half Obi Wan must train the one from Tatooine [Episode II: Attack of the Clones] It's the clone age, sand people rampage Mommy got flayed, strayed Ani's bae is Padme [Episode III: Revenge of the Sith] (Anakin vs. Obi Wan and Yoda versus Sidius and Grievous versus Obi Wan, you're breaking my heart) Anakin you are breaking my heart Order is made, Jedi are slain Kill all the baby tiny younglings Sid takes the throne, Long live the clones Burn Ani, turn him to a robo [Episode IV: A New Hope] Leia hides plans, Vader chokes a man Alderaan's gone and Han shoots first You're my only hopie Obi Wan Look, a small moon That's a space ship Worshipfullness, walking carpet This princess better pay out Use the force, Luke Close your eyes and shoot [Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back] Lando betrays Han and friends in the sky Skywalker flies, do or don't, there's no try Try the dark side No! No, no! No! Luke, I'm your daddykins (what?!) Your mom was kissing Anakin (ew.) Han's frozen I love you I know [Episode VI: Return of the Jedi] It's father, son and daughter A dynasty united at last The galaxy is free from evil Thanks to the goodness in Darth from the past