Why are all our heroes so imperfect

Why do they always bring me down

Why are all our heroes so imperfect

The statue in the park has lost his crown



William Faulkner drunk and depressed

Dorothy Parker mean, drunk and depressed

And that guy in Seven Years in Tibet turned out to be a nazi

The founding fathers all had slaves, the explorers slaughtered the braves,

The Old Testament God can be so petty



Paul McCartney jealous of John, even more so now that he's gone

Dylan was so mean to Donovan in that movie

Pablo Picasso cruel to his wives

My favorite poets took their own lives

Orson Welles peaked at 25, ballooned before our eyes

and he sold bad wine



Heard Babe Ruth was full of malice

Lewis Carroll I'm sure did Alice

Plato in the cave with those very young boys

TS Elliott hated Jews, FDR didn't save the Jews

All the French joined the resistance after the war

Raymond Chandler drunk and depressed

Tennessee Williams drunk and depressed

Think I'll just get drunk and depressed.