[1st verse:]
Fiddler Joe from Kokomo took lessons on the piccolo
After seven years or so, he could play a violin
Beneath his whiskered chin, he'd tuck his violin
And when you least expected, Fiddler Joseph would begin

[chorus:]
On his fid-fid-fid-fid-fid-fid-fiddle-dee-dee!
He played a melody
As plain as plain could be
Now he might have played that tune
On his harp or his bassoon
But he played it on his fid-fid-fiddle-dee-dee!

[2nd verse:]
Joseph met a girl last Spring who said, "Come up and bring a ring"
Joseph had no ring to bring, so he brought his violin
A cunning B flat grin hung from his whiskered chin
And when the maiden shouted, "Mister Fiddler Man, begin"

[additional verses:]
Joe and Jim, like two big fools, went one night to steal some jewels
Joseph had no burglar tools, so he brought his violin
Soon Joseph said to Jim, "This is the house, go in
Go in, and I'll accomp'ny you on my violin"

When Miss Stiles wed farmer Giles, the folks came round from miles and
miles
Fiddler Joe, with many smiles, brought along his violin
The "Wedding March" you see, had slipped his memory
So, as they walked the aisle, he played this simple melody

Joseph watched some people play the game we call croquet one day
Joseph couldn't play croquet, so he played his violin
A lady, tall and thin, took out a long hat-pin
And, while Joseph wasn't looking, stuck him in his violin

Joe's wife couldn't stand the breeze that came from some Limburger
cheese
So she put the cheese and the breeze into Joseph's violin
When first she put it in, the cheese was weak and thin
But when the cheese grew strong enough, it choked the violin

The doctor told poor Joseph's dad, "Joe needs an operation bad"
So they cut 'most all he had, all except his violin
The doc said with a grin, "To stop would be a sin
There's nothing left to cut, so let's cut his violin