I went to church on Sunday, I swung my chariot low

Reached up to kiss the deacon, he said "You'd better go"

Trouble, I'm in trouble with him

Trouble's where I'm going

Trouble's the only place I've ever been



Let's buy a watermelon, swallow all the seeds

Forget what Mama told us, do everything we please

Trouble, trouble again

Trouble's where we're going

Trouble's the only place we've ever been



Let's pour a little whiskey, drink a little gin

Listen to Merle Haggard like he's loving me again

Trouble, I'm even in trouble with him

Trouble's where I'm going

Trouble's the only place I've ever been



Let's turn off the TV, I'm tired of CNN

Let's throw a little party, invite some sinners in

Trouble, trouble again

Trouble's where we're going

Trouble's the only place we've ever been



I'll paint your toenails baby, you paint my toenails too

We'll take a walk down Main Street and watch what people do

Trouble, let's get in trouble with them

Trouble's where we're going

Trouble's the only place we've ever been



There's people building prisons for people like you and me

Some people just can't stand people like us being free

Trouble, what's trouble with them

Trouble's where we're heading

Trouble's the only place we've ever been



Sooner or later, darling, everybody's gotta go

Let's you and me leave early, get a seat on the first row

Trouble, trouble again

Trouble's where we're going

Trouble's the only place we've ever been