I am a Buddha, a bruiser, the King of all Kings.
And I'm drinking to forget the feelings that a hangover 
brings.
All the ladies love the brown man in the hottest of 
things.
So come on.

In a place called London, a brain dysfunctions,
The chalk of a life of missed line punch lines.
At half nine, I was feeling fine,
But now it's past time I'm like the scene of a crime.
I asked myself, 'What will it be?'
Another three or five pints before I reach insanity.
Already lost ability to see clearly.
I saw my nuts out flying freely.
Beers got a hold of me like I'm in the north sea,
On nothing but a dinghy that's sinking.
I'm thinking this gin I'm drinking,
Will cause amnesia in the morning.
This means it's OK to slap arse,
Humiliate people, walk with rats arse.
A packet of cigs now,
Will always pass,
?????

Cos I left my friends in the middle of a night club at 
a quarter past three,
I walked for seven miles just trying to find an empty 
taxi,
D'ya know, I was robbed of all my money and my 
identity, so come on.

Been on the bed here for days,
The world is a haze,
Imagining your girl take it ten different ways,
Slide on my face if the toilet floor's wet,
Sleeping on the mat of my mammas door step.
Lately, all my friends hate me,
I'm aching like my bones are breaking,
If you see me girls, I'll always be smiling,
Cos in my mind you're slowly undressing.
I'm disputing, jacking and bruising,
Never hesitating to get the brews in,
Like an alcoholic, I'm down from tits,
So paralytic I chat up dustbins,
???? is through the gate,
I don't want to have to masturbate,
Way off in space, I lost all taste,
Getting chased by females that don't have a face.

When I got home I found my best friend and my 
girlfriend alone,
They'd shagged for hours and hours whilst I was left 
for dead on the floor.
I had to punch myself to wake me from this horrible 
dream, so come on.

I am a Buddha, a bruiser, the King of all Kings.
And I'm drinking to forget the feelings that a hangover 
brings.
All the ladies love the brown man in the hottest of 
things.
So come on.
Come on.
Come on.