God, I have to know

Is it really true?

I refuse to believe in 

The stuff they write about you



You always look real depressive

But that´s what makes you cute

Say it ain´t so, say it ain´t so

Have you become a fruit?



Vaseline bizniz, improves your record sales

Vaseline bizniz, you know it never fails

Vaseline bizniz, will make you interesting

When you´re too pissed to dance and too high to sing



My teenage dream is fucked

Although you don´t know

While I plan for our marriage

You find some handsome guy to blow



Then you speak about it frankly

In an in-depth interview

And I slip into denial

´Cos I know it isn´t true



Vaseline bizniz, improves your record sales

Vaseline bizniz, you it never fails

Vaseline bizniz, will make you interesting

When you´re too pissed to dance and you´re too stoned to sing



Yeah, I had a bad time

My heart was torn in two

Burned all my posters

Thought I´d never make it through



But I worship another boy-group now

Everybody else sucks!

I even got their autographs

Take that, you backstreet cocks!