Artist: Frank Zappa

Title: Uncle Meat Film Excerpt Part II

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0:00] 



Phyllis: I used to watch him eat, and while he was eating I would talk to him, 

and while he was eating I would ask him what he was doing, and all he 

would say was, "I'm using the chicken to measure it." Till this day I still don't 

know what he was talking about! That Minnesota Tishman, he was some guy, 

but I still never understood what he meant. The chicken to measure it, I 

don't know, probably some secret thing. 



Phyllis: "I'm getting hot. You're really good at those dials, baby. You're the 

most manipulating person I've ever seen. What's he eating? Is he turning 

into a monster? Frank: But you're just making things out of it. Don: Put it in 

your mouth then your eyes. Frank: You're getting hot, come on! The last 

that . . . " I don't like this page, it's not so funny . . . 

FZ: What's the difference? 

Phyllis: I don't like this page, it's not so funny. "Oh, this gets me hot! Oh, this

gets me hot! Will get hot, I can get hot over it. Get hot over the hamburger, 

I can get it, you're getting hot, oh, am I hot over this hamburger! Think am I 

hot, for a hundred dollars you're getting hot, oh, am I hot, I'm so hot, I'm so 

hot from this hamburger, I'm hot." 



[1:08] 



Phyllis: Well, I'll just continue on with my work, I can't be thinking about such

things, gets me too confused. I think I need a shower, I'm tired, I'm hot, the 

room air-conditioning is not working. If you don't pay the bills, how does the 

air-conditioning gonna work? I'm going. 



Massimo: And now, dear friends, we are going to translate. This is my left 

hand. 

Phyllis: This is . . . 

Meredith: Violence! 

Stumuk: This is my left hand, non? 

Meredith: Violence! Ooh, I just, ooh! 

Guy From Alabama: You have an orgasm? 

Aynsley: No, but it just feels good! 

Guy From Alabama: Can I watch? 

Don: That's what we need, progress! 

Aynsley: Actually I think that's uh, that's cool. 

Guy From Alabama: Get the girl here in the red. 

Aynsley: Yeah. 

Massimo: Repeat after me: Questa e la mia mano destra 

Stumuk: Questa e mia mano destra 

Don: Progress! 

Phyllis: Where's the prostate gland? 

Massimo: Look out! 

Don: Progress is our most important product. 

Massimo: Guardalo che mangia! E mentre sta mangiando parlami mentre 

mangi. E chiedimi cosa sta facendo. 

Stumuk: Parle mi. 

Massimo: Che cosa sta facendo? Sta mangiando. Adesso chiedimi cosa sta 

facendo. Sta mangiando 

Stumuk: Guarda sta fachendo! 

Massimo: Ma non lo posso fare. 

Stumuk: Sta mangiando! 

Massimo: Me ne devo andare. 

Stumuk: Mene debo ndare! 

Massimo: Devo tornare. 

Stumuk: Dere tocnare! 

Massimo: Era un senatore a trentasette anni. 

Stumuk: Era un senatore de setreste ano. 



[2:26] 



Guy From Alabama: What band being you playing in? 

Aynsley: I played in a blues band. 

Guy From Alabama: Blues band, so do I! 

Aynsley: Blues. 

Guy From Alabama: Blues! 

Aynsley: Blues avant-garde, you know? 

Guy From Alabama: Yeah, I know what you mean. 



Massimo: And this is my last single. 



Phyllis: Oh, what is he doing? You still carrying on with that song? It's the 

same thing? I can't, I can't do it anymore. I'm going to make these louder 

so I don't have to hear about him. Forget the past! 

Don: I'm sure that it's going to be a hit single. 

Phyllis: We're coming to the beginning of a new era, wherein the 

development of the inner self. But you, what do you do? You watch television

 and you play with "The Bun," driving me crazy. Leave me alone. 

Stumuk: But this is twelve years later. 

Phyllis: I know. 

Stumuk: Have a new "Bun." 

Phyllis: I know. 

Stumuk: A better "Bun." 

Phyllis: What kind of new "Bun"? You . . . 

Stumuk: A brown "Bun." 

Phyllis: Every year you tell me is a new "Bun," I'm tired of this. I'm gonna, 

I'm gonna give it all up, I'm gonna go back to New York, I'm tired of you 

already. Finish! I can't. No, no, no, no. Go! Can you stop me? 



FZ: I wanna do another take of the same situation from the other side. 

Carl: Let me go on the other side. 

FZ: And Mr. Tishman, it's, you've gotta find . . . 

Phyllis: When I remember this . . . 

FZ: Yeah 

Carl: Let me just see uh, "Bun." 

FZ: Minnesota Tishman. 

Phyllis: Right here. 

Carl: Uh, give me the, give me . . . first . . . 

Phyllis: I remember that guy . . . 

FZ: Isn't he handsome? 

Phyllis: Yeah. 

FZ: He was using the chicken to measure it. 

Haskell Wexler: Can I stop now, Frank? 

FZ: Sure. 

Haskell Wexler: Okay, cut the cam.