Fat Amy
Fat Amy - I Am Not That Fat lyrics
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that there is hope for you and it starts with my best friend Jenny u see Jenny used to be fat just like the rest of us fat asses that like to sit around on the couch all day and be fat i admit it i used to be a whopping 240 lbs but now that i met my friend i am down to 205 lbs and in only 3 1/2 months with a shake for breakfast, a shake for lunch, and a slice of bread for dinner. it's the miracle diet!!! i also engage in lots and lots of dirty dirty sex with my fat ass husband, who is also on the diet. he has gone from 420 lbs to 380 lbs in 3 1/2 months and he looks sexier and sexier every day...especially when he is naked. i would also like to take this time to advertise a brand new store where people like you and me can go shopping without embarrassment. u see they have stores for the small and petite little wenches that think they're hot shit just because they don't have to wear maternity clothes when they aren't pregnant. they also have stores for the "big and tall" but for people like me who are big but not tall, well, clothing companies like to forget about us when it comes to making nice clothes, such as spandex. something about not having enough material to make the size i need or something. but anyway this new store has everything we need and more. the store has aisles that are 2x the size of a regular store, so no more backing out of the aisle to let the other people get out, a definite plus. also the entrances and exits are like barn doors, except the open with a motion detector...ingenious!!! the store carries clothing of all sizes...except for normal people that meet the weight requirements to use an elevator. what is the name of this amazing place you might ask well it is called "Vertically Challenged and Pleasantly Plump" and it fits the store perfectly without putting down us fat asses. now if you take time to call the 800 number a recording will help u find the nearest location of the store and i'm tellin ya this place is going to be popular i'm talking McDonald's type popular and we all know how much we love that place so just call this number (800) SPANDEX ext. FAT (800) 772-6339 ext. 328 and if you want to go on my fabulous diet, the number is (800) 01 JENNY (800) 015-3669 GOOD LUCK FATSO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -fat amy