{*channel surfing until a kid's TV show*

Hello boys and girls!

Today we're gonna talk about father and daughter relationships

Do you have a daddy? I'll bet you do!

Who's your daddy?



[Hailie] Daddy what are you doing?

[Em + H] Okay then! Everybody, listen up!

[Eminem] I'm goin to hell! Who's comin with me?!

[Hailie] Somebody please help me! I think my dad's gone cray-zayy



[Eminem]

There's no mountain I can't climb, there's no tower too high

No plane that I can't learn how to fly

What do I gotta do to get through to you

to show you there ain't nothin I can't take this chainsaw to?

{Hailie: *VROOM* Fuckin brains, brawn and brass balls

I cut 'em off, and got 'em pickled and bronzed in a glass jar

inside of a hall with my framed autographed sunglasses

with Elton John's name, on my drag wall

I'm out the closet, I've been lyin my ass off

All this time me and Dre been fuckin with hats off

(Suck it Marshall!) So tell Laura and her husband to back off

'fore I push this motherfuckin button and blast off

and launch one at these Russians and that's all {*boom*

Blow every fuckin thing except Afghanistan on the map off

When will it stop? When will I knock the crap off?

{*knocking* Hailie, tell 'em baby - (My dad's lost it!)



[Chorus: Eminem] + {Hailie

There's really nothin else to say, I-I can't explain it

{I think my dad's gone cray-zayy

A little help from Hailie Jade, won't you tell 'em baby

{I think my dad's gone cray-zayy

There's nothin you could do or say, that could ever change me

{I think my dad's gone cray-zayy

There's no one on earth that can save me, not even Hailie

{I think my dad's gone cray-zayy



[Eminem]

It's like my mother always told me

Rana rana rana rana rana rana rana rana rana rana and codeine

and God dammit you little motherfucker

If you ain't got nuthin nice to say then don't say nuthin

... uh, fuck that shit bitch!

Eat a motherfuckin dick, chew on a prick

and lick a million motherfuckin cocks per second

I'd rather put out a motherfuckin gospel record

I'd rather be a pussy-whipped bitch, eat pussy

and have pussy lips glued to my face with a clit ring

in my nose than quit bringin my flows

Quit givin me my ammo; can't you see why I'm so mean?

If y'all leave me alone this wouldn't be my M.O.

I wouldn't have to go eenee-meene-mini-moe

Catch a homo by his toe, man I don't know no more

Am I the only fuckin one who's normal any more? {Dad!



[Chorus]



[Eminem]

My songs can make you cry, take you by surprise

at the same time, can make you dry your eyes

with the same rhyme; see what you're seein is a genius at work

Which to me isn't work

So it's easy to misinterpret it at first

cause when I speak, it's tongue-in-cheek

I'd yank my fuckin teeth

Before I'd ever bite my tongue, I'd slice my gums

Get struck by fuckin lightnin twice at once

and die and come back as Vanilla Ice's son

And walk around the rest of my life spit on

and kicked and hit with shit everytime I sung

like R. Kelly as soon as "Bump and Grind" comes on

More pain inside of my brain than the eyes of a little girl

inside of a plane, aimed at the World Trade

Standin on Ronnie's grave, screamin at the sky

'til clouds gather it's Clyde Mathers and Bonnie Jade

And that's pretty much the gist of it

The parents are pissed but the kids love it

9 millimeter heater stashed in 2 seaters with meat cleavers

I don't blame you, I wouldn't let Hailie listen to me neither



[Chorus]



[Hailie]

Ha ha ha ha!!

You're funny daddy!