I know a guy who

Goes to shows

He makes me coffee

He makes me toast

He don't use butter

He don't use cheese

He don't use jelly

Or any of these

He uses vaseline

Vaseline

Vaseline

Vaseline

I know a guy who

Goes to shows

But when he's at home and

Blows his nose

He don't use tissues

Or his sleeves

He don't use napkins

Or any of these

He uses magazines

Magazines

Magazines

Magazines

I know a girl who

Reminds me of Cher

She's always changing

The colour of her hair

She don't use nothing

From The store

She Likes to keep her hair / Real orange

She uses tangerines

Tangerines

Tangerines

Tangerines