There's an evil force spreading far and wide

'Cross this kingdom of pipes and fungus

We have seen the hell of each deadly turtle shell

But a hero resides among us

Not a towering man, not a daunting knight

Still, a smart lionheart is he

Who is this noble demigod?

It's a-me

It's a-me



There's a tyrant king with a reptile heart

And he's started a wave of crime now

From his ship high above he abducted my love

For, like, the fourteenth or fifteenth time now

Who will stop this foe? Who will save the day?

Win this war, yes, victoriously

I'll give you just one guess, time's up

It's a-me

It's a-me



I have hopped through his hordes, so much blood on my shoes

With a murderous battle cry: "hoo-hoo!"

I have burnt them alive with the fire from my hands

Every last one, I vow, shall die!



And I run underneath as the tyrant leaps

And I turn just in time as he finally reaps his recompense:

Death by lava



And I run down the hall, for I cannot wait

I'm unstoppable now on a charge heading straight into the arms

Of my lover



Thank you, Mario, but our Princess is in another castle

Oh



There's an anguished man with a forlorn face

For it's cold and the nights are lonely

He looks all around, but his Princess can't be found

It's his fault and it's his fault only

He brought on this war with a cocky grin

Only now does he truly see

He hoisted this upon himself

Who is this Italian handyman elf?

It's a-me