I thought it was so much more, a way for me to breathe, 
in the face of a world that I would never survive. And if 
I could only touch it again, if I could feel that way 
forever, nothing could hurt me, nothing could bring me 
down. Take my pain, take it all away, let me live in this 
world without fear. That is what I was promised. And I 
thought it was so much more, but it never gave me a 
fucking thing, except wasted breathes and cracked up 
schemes, eating away at my fucking dreams. Spent so much 
time looking for the answer and I never had to look at 
all. What a waste of life, on a fucking lie. Chemically 
induced laughter is so much sadder than anything this 
life could ever deal, and I'm not going to waste one more 
minute, on living lies under freedom's disguise.