Bilge Pumps
Bilge Pumps - The Farmer lyrics
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There was an old farmer who lived by a rock He sat in the meadow a'shaking his Fist at the boys who were down by the crick Their feet in the water, their hands on their Marbles and playthings and in days of yore There came a young lady. She looked like a Pretty young creature, she sat on the grass She pulled up her dresses and showed us her Ruffles and laces and white puffy duck She said she was learning a new way to Bring up her children and learn them to knit While the boys in the barnyard were shoveling Refuse and litter from yesterday's hunt While the girl in the meadow was rubbing her Eyes at the fellows as girls sometimes do To make it quite clear that she wanted to Go for a nice, pleasant stroll on the grass Then hurry back home for a nice piece of Ice cream and cake that stood three layers tall And after desert she was ready to Go for another walk down by the dock With any young man with a sizeable Roll of one hundreds and a big bulge up front If he'd ask politely, she'd show him her Little pet dog who was subject to fits Then maybe she'd let him grab hold of her Small tender hands with a movement so quick Then she'd bend on over and suck on his Soda so sweetly 'til she finished it Then pull down her panties to rub on her Hip that she bruised when she ran down the hall 'Cause he tried to force her to lick on his Candy so tasty made of butterscotch And then he spread whip cream all over her Cookies that she had been baking all night If you think this is dirty, you know you're damned right!