Level up
I'ma tape your console shut
Just because that's what you get for not giving a fuck
About me
Got your head locked up in fantasy
Tragedy
Still I don't see why you're mad at me
I remember way back in the day
When you were just not interested in these games you play
All that I would hear from you is they were gay
Now I don't see you for a week unless you stay away
So what's up baby?
Can't you hear me talking to you?
Yeah, I know that you've been busy cuz your character's new
You don't let those mandragoras get the best of you
Don't you think that it was high time you tried something new?

So you're level 13
Sorceress and mana queen
The problem is I don't know what that's supposed to mean
Are my stats too low?
Cuz that's something I can understand
I wish I were a gnome because you won't flirt with this man
You talk about crystals
They're buried in some cave
I'd like to be with you
But you won't let me play
All I hear
Is the constant "ding" of your increase

I see the back of your head
It gets me grindin' my teeth
My mind leaves
And I remember those early days
When you first started to get into the video games
Animal Crossing
Then you switched to The Sims
Now you game longer than me unless I carry you in

'Kay this is crazy
What's this about having a baby?
You know it ain't mine
Cuz I aint been around lately
And the last time I was here
I just watched TV
While you sat and leveled up in front of your PC
Maybe it the child of that elf you been seein
Oh, you thought I didn't know?
I asked the high priestess of Shale Eden
And she divulged to me some serious shit
Like you been fuckin' around
And you a serious bitch
So take your bullshit
And you can keep it online
Because I finally found a woman who can give me some time
She's up for knockin' the boots
And for some Metroid Prime
So excuse me as I summon you
A boot to the sideline