Last night I stumbled in to a bar room
I met a girl with a pint in her purse
She was cute as two speckled puppies
And I said Ben you could do worse

Then I walked across a room full of tables
Walked across her table too
And I flopped myself down in a chair
And said hi there
She whispered my name is Mabel
And all I could say was hi there

I said permit me to introduce myself Ben Colder here
She said it ain't been no colder here than anyplace else

I had her almost persuaded
What happened to the doodle-doodle-do... piano... thank you
To slip- strip herself of her pride
Almost persuaded to slip me a drink on the side

Then we danced and we danced and we danced and we danced
That is I thought I was dancin' somebody stepped on my hand
Then I looked in her eyes and I saw it
The reflection of my wedding band

And I thought that sure is strange I ain't even married
What it was it was my wrist watch

I had her almost persuaded
Once more there Argus
To come and be my own
Smart alec
(Almost persuaded)
Then her boyfriend came and made me go home