Hands are shackled, feet are bound
Sinking in the icy waters
Seems inevitable our protagonist will drown
There's no rescue, no way off this ride
If all the world's a stage
We're burning down the theater with everyone inside

It's in the presentation
It's prestidigitation
It's kick the can, slight of hand
Fear and doubt, rage on demand

Here comes the new disaster
Here comes the end of days
Next up, the sweet hereafter
We'll tell you all about after this commercial break
Stay tuned for scary monsters
Watch out for rising tides
But first a word from sponsors
Might be a mess but it's a hell of a good time

The river's dried up, the banks are broke
Our leaders lied to us
But if we pay attention we can get in on the joke
'Cause there's still laughter, there's still hope
We've gotta pay the hangman
But that don't mean we've gotta give him all this rope

The devil's in the details
They're killing it at retail
So cross-promote, now cast your vote
There's plenty of room on the lifeboat

Here comes the new disaster
Here comes the end of days
Next up, the sweet hereafter
We'll tell you all about after this commercial break
Stay tuned for scary monsters
Watch out for rising tides
But first a word from sponsors
Might be a mess but it's a hell of a good time

Midnight ticking down, time to turn the ship around
Everybody feeding your antisocial media
Fear, fear disappear, we don't need you back in here
Save the force, save the whales, throw the CEO in jail

Come together, come what may
Live to fight another day
Don't, don't, don't believe the hype
This is no way to live your life

Here comes the new disaster
Here comes the end of days
Next up, the sweet hereafter
We'll tell you all about it after this commercial break
Stay tuned for scary monsters
Watch out for rising tides
But first a word from sponsors
Might be a mess, might be a mess
Might be a mess but it's a hell of a good time

Here comes the new disaster