With Jean Wilson

The song starts off and this boy
Is writing a letter to Dorothy Dix
He says, dear Dorothy Dix
I am in worst fix that
I have ever been in

Says, just what does a boy do
When right out of the blue
She invites him in and says

(Ooh, ooh
Make yourself comfortable, baby)

Yeah, now you can
Tell right there, friends
That he don't know nothing
Because, he don't, because
Let me tell you something
It ain't outta no blue
That she invited him in there

No, sir, she had everything
Squared away before she
Ever got him to the door

(I got some records here
To put you in the mood)

Yeah, see, she's got Hearts of Stone
That's a real good potent record
And all of Roy Acuff's songs

(The phone is off the hook
So no one can intrude)

See, the reason she took the
Phone off the hook is so
He couldn't get no outside help

(I feel romantic and the
Record changer's automatic, baby)

Yeah, I think, friends
That by this time, it's pretty clear
With her feeling romantic and
Automatic record changers and everything
That she ain't got that boy in there
To eat no cake and ice cream
All right, you all go ahead

(Sweetheart, we've hurried
Through the dinner
Hurried through the dance
Left before the picture show
Was through)

See, he spent all kinds
Of money on her that night
He did, there ain't telling how much
He dropped at the Bluebird Cafe
Right by itself

And after going through
All of the trouble to take her
To the moving pictures
She yanked him out of there before
Tex Ritter shot the first Indian
And why did she do all this

(To leave some time for this
To hug a hug and kiss a kiss now)

Look out now, look out
See, she said right there
That she wants him to kiss her
And she does, friends, she does

What I mean to tell you
She wants him to flat
Plant one on her

(Take off your shoesies, dear
And loosen up your tie)

Do you notice that she never
Does call him by his right name
She don't know it, she don't
They ain't even shook hands yet

(I've got some kisses here
Let's try one on for size
I'll turn the lights low while)

Yeah, hold, hold
Hold it right there, everybody
Hold it right there
Now right chere's his chance

He can either, while
She's up cutting that light down
He can tip on out or he can
Do the real all American
Semper Paratis type of thing
And I'd do it if I was him

I'd put me a whole nother batch
Of records on that machine
I'd cut that light down one more notch
I'd kick off my two-toned perforated shoes
I'd get me an armful of that sweet thing
And we'd both

(Make ourselves comfortable, baby)